[takes his face in hands, careful even as he wields the name like a weapon. something sharp to draw attention and draw a line]
Ya can't see it from yer own eyes. And that's fine. Not many people can see themselves real clear I guess.
But I've watched. M'always looking.
And what I see is people always coming to be at yer side. Even when yer foolish. Even when yer harsh. People are drawn to ya. Always coming with hands and hearts open. Probably cuz you do the same to them without even thinkin'.
Yer gonna always be loved. And not just by me. Yer someone people will always make room for. So take up that space.
Greedy like a hyena. Carry that with ya as I carry yer name and love. Carry a greed and feed it. Be a glutton. Grab it all.
crumpling into. exhausted now. this was a lot. this has all been a lot. things are a lot. hes so tired so sad so unsure so so so so many things none pleasant]
is that I'm still glad you're here. Even though everything is basically awful. Even though we keep getting killed. Even though you have to watch us get killed, too. I'm not letting any freaky comas or anything take you no matter how bad things are or how tired you get. I need you. You're mine, too.
Re: day 225
[takes his face in hands, careful even as he wields the name like a weapon. something sharp to draw attention and draw a line]
Ya can't see it from yer own eyes. And that's fine. Not many people can see themselves real clear I guess.
But I've watched. M'always looking.
And what I see is people always coming to be at yer side. Even when yer foolish. Even when yer harsh. People are drawn to ya. Always coming with hands and hearts open. Probably cuz you do the same to them without even thinkin'.
Yer gonna always be loved. And not just by me. Yer someone people will always make room for. So take up that space.
Greedy like a hyena. Carry that with ya as I carry yer name and love. Carry a greed and feed it. Be a glutton. Grab it all.
Re: day 225
hearing someone else say his name feels like a bolt of electricity crackles through his body, and his wide eyes instantly go to nettle's.
and he listens, and listens, eyebrows drawing together. does he believe all that? hard to see for himself, as nettle says.
easier question: does he believe nettle? yes, always. so he nods slowly, feels that command like a heartbeat: be greedy be greedy be greedy ]
Re: day 225
he just wants his boy happy and healthy and surrounded by people who love him even if that makes it easier to be lost in the crowd]
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crumpling into. exhausted now. this was a lot. this has all been a lot. things are a lot. hes so tired so sad so unsure so so so so many things none pleasant]
Re: day 225
[ said after a moment, quiet, exhausted, ]
is that I'm still glad you're here. Even though everything is basically awful. Even though we keep getting killed. Even though you have to watch us get killed, too. I'm not letting any freaky comas or anything take you no matter how bad things are or how tired you get. I need you. You're mine, too.
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[snuffle]
Damn.
Re: day 225
Would you like a funnel cake in these trying times? I hear the chef is a real up-and-comer.
Re: day 225
[holds tighter]
Don' get up. Hold me longer. Feel lonely.
Re: day 225
[ HOLDS ONTO, makes no move to leave ]
You wanna talk about it?
Re: day 225
...mmmm. I'll tell ya something else though.
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Happy and sad and scared and angry and angry and...look behind and...
[opens mouth, no words come out]
Re: day 225
will try to pull back and look at his face, if his hold loosens enough for that ]
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Could you like. Mime it. Or write it.
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[ but okay looking at his hand and wiggling his fingers in the order nettle touched them ]
Happy...sad...scared...angry...angry...look back?
[ looks behind him because he can't not try that ]
Re: day 225
I can hear it. When I do it.
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